Depending on the task we may or may not consider things we must do to accomplish a said task if we have an expectation of being successful. There are areas in our interpersonal and personal life where “musts” are essential in accomplishing the desired result. In a moment I will discuss what I have experienced are the musts when it comes to personal recovery. Let’s consider these examples first.
Most all people who bake will instruct that these items must be included if you expect to be successful in your baking. These ingredients would likely include flower, leaveners, sugar, salt, dairy, oil/ shortening, they also may include extracts, flavorings, spices, and any other addons you might want based on what you are baking. When it comes to riding a bike, in a similar fashion, there are things you must do to be a successful bicyclist. You must have balance (even if you are using training wheels), you must put your hands on the handlebars, and you must pedal. I must inhale and I must exhale in a balanced fashion for me to have a full breath. You get the idea of where I am going with this.
Once again, in many aspects of life musts are negotiable, and in other areas of life, they are not. I could give other examples but let’s move on to recovery from addiction. This addiction can either be substance-based or behavioral. So, when I speak to you of addiction, I am speaking to you of drugs, alcohol, gambling, compulsive overeating, pornography, and other types of behavioral challenges. Some are connected and some operate independently. Whatever the case if we are to recover there are musts that we must do.
I will list in order some of the things that we must do to have a recovered life. I am talking beyond the absence of the substance or behavior. If that is all you are looking to accomplish, then this blog will be more than you would want. I cannot teach you how to not use or engage in said behavior. What I can do is teach you how to align your thinking and your personal beliefs that will help you stay sober and on a path to a new life. Let’s jump into the deep end of the pool with the list of musts I have found to be necessary.
Musts
- Admit that I have an addiction and or compulsion that is negatively impacting my life
- Acknowledge if I do not change this behavior worse things will happen
- Thinking I can engage in this behavior on a partial or temporary basis is part of my addiction
- Understand that I cannot do this alone
- incorporate help whether that be spiritual in a non-tangible sense or earthly in a tangible relationship
- I must look deeper into my addiction to get a full picture of how far I have fallen.
- As part of my physical and spiritual recovery process, I must look to those I have injured and harmed along the way and make amends for doing so.
- Self-monitoring is another must that I must daily engage in or risk falling back into negative behaviors
- I must daily seek the assistance of my spiritual resource and any individuals who have helped me along this journey
- A daily must is reaching out to assist others who may have a like condition and to continue to practice the things that got me to a position of recovery in the first place
These are musts I have found necessary in my personal recovery journey. It has also benefitted those I have assisted along the way. Invariably, those who relapse to their old way of living and or engage in negative behavior are ones who never fully embraced the necessary musts in their life.
Maybe somewhere along the journey, they forget how necessary the musts are. They forgot the musts that Sir Isaac Newton taught us with the three basic laws of motion. The first law teaches us that things that are in motion tend to stay in motion and things that are at rest tend to stay at rest. The musts that are a part of my daily life give me the type of life I have always wanted. I hope you have found this valuable, and I trust your journey is one that deepens your sense of gratitude, as you embrace the musts.
Robert Pardon
Robert is the Recovery Guy. Getting clean and sober on April 25, 1986 has given me the insight and practical skill set to not only stay sober, but to also re-invent myself to the person I always wanted to become. Showing others how to do this is my life goal.
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